I felt Rumi’s advices were important, and they are, but maybe I felt too emotional about them.

Finally, when I spoke, my palms were as wet as kitchen dishcloths. My legs were as unsteady as a marionette dolls’. My hands shook like they stood in front of a fan.

As soon as I finished, I couldn’t even remember what I had said, or how it had gone. My body melted into a warm pool. I spent the rest of the day in a stupor, overwhelmed with relief. 

It seemed like a waste of energy to be so exhausted from nerves. I decided I needed more practice in public speaking. It had been a while.

So I’ve said yes to subsequent opportunities to present in front of groups. Recently, I prodded an opportunity to present.

My teacher invited other classes, and a few administrators, and we had a share day in the Turkish language department. My teacher and I spent weeks translating a story. As soon as the translation ended, and the practicing began, I nearly bailed.

I couldn’t believe what I’d gotten myself into. Remembering all those words??? And it was, like, 12 minutes long! Too long. Trying to get all those words out IN TURKISH without continuously falling all over myself?!? It felt overwhelming. I doubted whether I should join the event.

I took a day, and collected myself. I determined to practice, and get better.  So I relaxed, and had fun with it.

I practiced. And I delivered. I did it.

Here’s what I would have done differently:

• Brought a podium for my notes.
• Practiced in the same room I’d deliver in.
• Practiced reading the story in front of my kids, or someone who makes me nervous.

As I watch the video, I’m critical of myself. I think I could have done better. But who cares?

Presentations bring us together, they challenge us, and they give us a common goal. Presentations ROCK!

Here’s what I did right:

• I practiced!
• I worked for months, and I delivered.
• I put myself out there.
• I enjoyed it.
• I balanced this presentation with other things in a busy life.
• I only spent a little energy being nervous.
• I gave most of my energy to translating, practicing, and connecting with my fellow students and the school staff.
• Afterwards, I continued a very productive day, a happy day.

So…presentations are Easy! I like my work productive, connective, and happy–and that’s exactly what I got.

Other folks presented too, and I hope the exercise was useful and meaningful for them. I think it was. It’s good to get together, and share.

There’s More to It

Perhaps it shouldn’t matter, but somewhere in my darkest, most self-doubting core, it did: among the students, I was the only girl, I was the only civilian, and I was the only volunteer. Everyone else was male, in the military, and vastly more professionally accomplished than me.

They had rank. They had to be there. I fought the urge to feel “little.” I was a student. I was every bit a student. I reminded myself: the journey is always mine.

We each showed up, we put different things into it, at our various levels, from our various perspectives, we got out of it what we needed, we shared our presentations, we supported each other, and we connected. Our classes intersected. It was a good thing. Apparently, I do have a voice. (Even though I’m a volunteer).

I wanted practice public speaking, and suddenly we had several classes and administrators coming together for presentations. Add a few cookies and hot tea (courtesy of my teacher), and there was a crowd. Voila!

Here’s what I learned, that I want to keep reminding myself: ask for what you want! Bonus: It may be good for everybody!

You can read The Hungry Coat by Demi–IN ENGLISH–and I highly recommend it!

My actual presentation lasted about 17 minutes. Here’s a 2-minute video to share with you (conveniently skipping the worst of my mess-ups, cause today we’re celebrating the highlights!):

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